Thoughts From a Therapist
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How to Write a Parenting Plan: A Co-Parenting Template for Separated and Divorced Parents
The ten parts most parenting plans share, from the weekly schedule to how disputes get settled, with the alternatives that fit different families and…
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What Is Cycle Work in Couples Therapy? How Every Interaction Can Spiral Into Conflict or Connection
In couples therapy, a cycle is the circle two people create when each person’s response becomes the other’s next stimulus. Inside every turn, each…
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Why Don’t People Listen to Me?
Why don’t people listen? Communication often fails when we name what we dislike or make ambiguous requests without defining what we want instead.
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An Integrative Alternative to the DSM | A Coherence Map of Mental Health
An integrative framework for understanding mental health beyond symptom classification. The Fractal Field model maps how identity, relationships, embodiment, values, and meaning interact to…
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It’s Not My Job To Make You Happy | Understanding Responsibility in Relationships
The discussion explores the complexities of relational responsibility in various contexts. It emphasizes that responsibility for another’s happiness is neither absolute nor zero, but…
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Social Anxiety and the Burden of Control | From Managing Perception to Living in Congruence
Social anxiety is often described as fear of judgment. That description is accurate, but incomplete. At a deeper level, social anxiety is more precisely…
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Why Dialectics and Deconstruction Are Essential for Solving Real Problems
We are often told that the world is divided—left vs right, pro-choice vs pro-life, individual freedom vs collective good. But underneath these oppositional identities,…
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Interviening with Extremism
This piece examines the emotional roots of extremist beliefs, highlighting trauma, shame, and the need for belonging as key drivers. It emphasizes that change…
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Character Matters
The post discusses the erosion of core human values and character amidst political and cultural upheaval, emphasizing that the means and ends are inseparable.…
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Can Democracy Survive Without Truth?
Title: The Truth & Accountability Oath: A New Standard for Presidential Candidates Introduction: Can Democracy Survive Without Truth? The time to address this pressing…
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The ‘List’ – Goal creation in couples counseling
The content discusses challenges couples face in therapy regarding task delegation and list-making. It highlights how differing perceptions of responsibility can lead to burnout…
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“Control Yourself!” Who is being asked to control who?
The post discusses the complex relationship between community, cultural expectations, and personal control over emotions and behavior. It highlights how control is often an…
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Choice and quality of life | What choice, if removed, would most positively impact your well being?
The United States encompasses various sub-cultures influenced by a dominant meta-culture emphasizing freedom and choice. This dual nature of choice can lead to both…
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Intentionality and Happiness | How life choices are impacted by purpose
This post emphasizes the relationship between intentionality and happiness, urging self-reflection. It identifies three approaches: balance, where both elements support each other; favoring intentionality,…
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The Relationship between Anxiety and Attention
Attention is a learn-able skill There are many famous quotes and affirmations spoken through the years that point to the humbling truth that most…
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Fear, Competence, Values and Anger in Parenting Rambunctious Children
This post will investigate how our perceived parenting competence impacts our fear and resulting emotional and behavioral reactions. We will focus on how fear…
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Parenting Paradigm | a level system to conceptualize parenting strategies
I was in a couples therapy session guiding an enactment surrounding an argument the couple had surrounding a parenting issue over the weekend. Both…
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Early Childhood Questions to Promote Bonding
I compiled the below questions to be used in an adult couple relationship to help facilitate bonding. When our partners see the depth of…
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Choice is Oppression
Wow that is a provocative way to start! of course Choice is also liberation and a billion of other things, but in the post…
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Accepting, condoning, and boundaries
How do you accept what you can’t condone? what is it that your are accepting? we love people and we want them to behave…
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